Friends drop you like a ball when you are caught drinking. So before my teenager friends could discover my addiction I myself acclaimed the tag of being alcoholic.
I entertained them with amazing pranks like I look sleepy because I am an alcoholic. I did all this to avoid criticism and rejection.
I felt lonely as my parents were working for long hours all week and on weekends also spent all their time managing household chores and fighting over small issues. House was never a pleasant place and insecurities triggered beer drinking in my habits. I preferred staying out of senses than staying alert to face isolation fears and feeling rejected.
Though I never realized in my teens what actually alcoholic meant but it occurred to me in soap on TV that it was a good word to relate. Alcoholism was my escapism from reality and truth. My recovery path initiated when my parents found me lying on the floor. When they consulted a physician he explained that my state was all because of over drinking.
My parents got alarmed and took me to alcoholic counselor. It was only after being sober for a few weeks I realized how I dragged into sea of fear with drinking habit. I became conscious of facts and clearly saw my situation and now I also wanted to be well. My mother left her job and stayed with me all this time.
Earlier I faced all with drinking like friends, classes, anxiety, rivalry, and school even my sports were attached to drinking. It was my boost for every action. Initially it was tough staying away from friend’s, places that connected me with drinking habit but on progressing at every step these disciplinary measures displayed good results.
Alcoholism is self commenced pain that takes emotional and physical toll on you itself. Even in teenage I have learnt a lesson of life –"never to surrender to alcohol in difficult times instead seek solutions with wisdom and patience". After all drinking never made my life simpler in any sense.